blackhemlock

Hey....

I would just like to make it clear that I would appreciate it if none of my stuff appeared on Facebook et al.  I like to keep RL and LJ seperate so please bear that in mind.

Thanks x

Hi,

As I have recently had a problem with bots accessing my LJ, I have decided to alter my friending policy.

If you want to be added to my f-list, leave a comment here.

If you just want to add me, that is fine but I won't necessarily friend back unless you have an active journal and I know that you aren't a bot or something nefarious (and I love that word!).

Thanks x

( There is Venom and then there is Venom )

Happy New Year to everyone... I hope that it is as fulfilling and peaceful as you want it to be.  If you don't, well, that is ok too!

This is my submission to torchwood_fest ... Enjoy!

Title: But the kisses have changed...
Author: blackhemlock
Word Count: 4,000 ish
Giftee: heeroluva 
Pairing: Jack/Ianto, Ianto/OMC (kinda), Jack/Others (implied)
Rating: PG-13 – although there is a little – almost miniscule – swearing.
Summary: But the kisses have changed... and Ianto doesn’t know why.
Warnings: None. Except for the one – or maybe two – bad words.
Setting/Time: Pre COE – although no real show references.
A/N: Thank you to my beta – and to the fest mods... I was a rather tardy Christmas elf this year. heeroluva  wanted kisses and realizations though I am not sure if this is really what was requested but I tried. I really hope you enjoy it!

( But the kisses have changed... )

Title: I Lost Myself to the Moonlight Glow
Pairing: Edward/Jacob (main), Edward/Bella (beginning), some Bella/Jacob & all other canon pairings
Warnings: this will be slash people so if that does not float your boat don't read this.
Rating: T
Summary: Werewolves are vicious and insane. They care about nothing but the kill and the Moon. They are also lethal to vampires.
Disclaimer: I own nothing, nada, neinte. It all belongs to Stephanie Meyer and whoever publishes the books where you are.
Author's Notes: I am trying to do something different here so concrit is gratefully accepted. I will be taking some liberties with the Quileute traditions. I do not own them and I do respect that they are a people with their own history but this is a work of fiction. Also, I am not a huge Bella fan but I am endeavoring not to bash her. I predict it will be a struggle. Additionally (because saying 'Also' again seems annoying), this is a WIP so there may be gaps between postings. I know what I am going to write, its just getting the time to write them.

Ok... Sorry this has taken so long but I am still not happy with it and if I don't post it now, well it might just drive me insane!  Enjoy x

( Chapter 02 - House of the Silent Dead )

 

Title: Chosen.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: They stole him. Just a little. Seconds of him, snatched out of time, out of space, taken beyond the World. To protect it. To protect Him.

 

( Part V )

Title: Chosen.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: They stole him. Just a little. Seconds of him, snatched out of time, out of space, taken beyond the World. To protect it. To protect Him.
 

( Part IV )

Title: Chosen.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: They stole him. Just a little. Seconds of him, snatched out of time, out of space, taken beyond the World. To protect it. To protect Him.

 

( Part III )

Title: Chosen.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: They stole him. Just a little. Seconds of him, snatched out of time, out of space, taken beyond the World. To protect it. To protect Him.

 

( Part II )

 

Title: Chosen.
Rating: PG-13
Beta: ebonyflames 
Spoilers: All of Torchwood - if you've seen all three series you are fine. If you haven't seen Children of Earth - don't read this. It'll spoil it.
Disclaimer:   It all belongs to R. T. Davies and the BBC
Pairing: Jack/Ianto, Gwen/Rhys, Johnny/Rhainnon - all canon
Word Count: 22,000 (plus a few more...)

Summary: They stole him. Just a little. Seconds of him, snatched out of time, out of space, taken beyond the World. To protect it. To protect Him.

A/N: I took part in another Tardis BigBang - they are so much fun. Some excellent artists and authors have put the time and effort in so go have a look ... Especially as you have to check out the gorgeous artwork that goes with this fic. Seriously, it is beautiful.

A/N 2: This is the way COE should have gone.

( Part I - because LJ hates long fics... )

 

Title: I Lost Myself to the Moonlight Glow
Pairing: Edward/Jacob (main), Edward/Bella (beginning), some Bella/Jacob & all other canon pairings
Warnings: this will be slash people so if that does not float your boat don't read this.
Rating: T
Summary: Werewolves are vicious and insane. They care about nothing but the kill and the Moon. They are also lethal to vampires.
Disclaimer: I own nothing, nada, neinte. It all belongs to Stephanie Meyer and whoever publishes the books where you are.
Author's Notes: I am trying to do something different here so concrit is gratefully accepted. I will be taking some liberties with the Quileute traditions. I do not own them and I do respect that they are a people with their own history but this is a work of fiction. Also, I am not a huge Bella fan but I am endeavoring not to bash her. I predict it will be a struggle. Additionally (because saying 'Also' again seems annoying), this is a WIP so there may be gaps between postings. I know what I am going to write, its just getting the time to write them.

I can't think of anything else right now but will add it when I do.

Enjoy x

 

 

( A Wolf Calls into the Night )

 

To anyone on Facebook... Check this group out -

If this group reaches 250,000 I will... 

Today is International ME/CFS & Fibromyalgia Awareness Day. Both ME/CFS and Fribromyalgia are debilitating illnesses that have no cure and very few treatment options.

I suffer from ME. "What the hell is that?" I hear you ask.  There is no simple answer to that question.  For every single sufferer the effects of ME are different.  Health professionals prefer to refer to the illness as CFS - Chronic Fatigue Syndrome - because this is the closest they can come to a definition.

It is "chronic" because for many (not all: there are a lucky few who manage to recover totally) there is no real escape.  It is long lasting and reoccurs at the most inconvenient of times.  For many people though, it never goes away.  
"Fatigue" is the only - out of a mile long list - symptom that all sufferers share.  Now, I know many of you are intelligent people and have already worked out that fatigue is just a fancy way of saying "tired", and you are right.  I imagine you are also thinking, well, being tired... that's not so bad.  You are wrong.  The fatigue that innocuous little F refers to is not the type you get after a late night out with friends and an early start.  It is the type you get after running 10 miles on little sleep with no energy drinks or food to pep you up.  It is a tiredness that burns through your body making it hurt to stay awake, making you want to scream at the world - LET ME SLEEP.  But, it doesn't go away.  It doesn't  matter how long you sleep for or how much you lie on the sofa and watch the Simpsons... it doesn't ebb.  It drags you down, mentally and physically, wrapping you in a fog so that the day becomes a blur of nothing but time you wish you could spend sleeping.

And finally, it is a "Syndrome" because it is a collection of symptoms.  For me, they are the following: fatigue, mental confusion (including slow processing, impaired concentration, unreliable memory, word aphasia and mental fog yet my brain doesn't stop working - it just yammers on like an old lady at the bingo), muscle pain, joint pain, fluctuating temperature (like now - my fingers are freezing but my face feels like it is on fire), headaches, sore throats, post-exertion fatigue, feeling weak and one crap immune system.

Sufferers though believe that CFS trivialises what they go through because it doesn't sound so bad.  Many people, including health professionals, don't believe it exists.  That what we suffer is all in our heads and that we should just pull ourselves together.

It's not that simple.

It takes me about half an hour to read one page of text because I can get to the end  of a paragraph and not remember what I have just read.  It hurts to stay in one place for a long period of time, so train journeys and lectures are a bitch.   Walking up a flight of stairs or a hill makes my legs feel weak and shaky and my muscles burn like someone has just poured lava into them.  When I feel cold, it doesn't matter how many jumpers I put on or how I curl around a hot-water bottle, I can't warm up because the cold is on the inside, right down in my bones.  After each of my uni lectures, I have to have a sleep because I just can't think any more and the world blurs away into nothingness.  It takes me a couple of hours each morning to get going.  There is no way I can do anything that requires serious thinking before lunch time.  When I go to sleep I don't wake up easily.  I can sleep for 24 hours (and I have done in the past) and feel absolutely no benefit but I just can't wake up.  Physically, I am unable to keep my eyes open.  It hurts to type for a long period of time so I am learning to use voice recognition.  I have to get a taxi from town because I can't carry my book bag and always feel as though the driver is judging me.  If I am ill, well, lets just say its been a month and my tonsillitis still hasn't gone anywhere.

And at nights I want to cry because my arms, my legs, my back, my neck, my fingers, my feet and my chest hurt so much that I contort my body into awkward positions just to get the smallest bit of relief.  The drugs just don't work but sometimes the tears do.

But it could be worse. 

Last year I really thought that my life was kind of over.  I could barely manage to get up and spend a day doing virtually nothing, lying on the sofa.  This year, I have almost finished my History degree.  It has only taken seven years.  Many people - my parents included - doubted that I could do it.  I was a straight A student all throughout school, my body just couldn't take uni.  But I knew that I would never be happy if I didn't go back and do it.  And I have.  

But on my terms.

I have been frank and honest and the university have been brilliant.  They have made allowances and concessions and I have felt guilty about accepting them.  But, there is no way I could have managed my degree without them.

There are times when I hate my life.  When I hate that I can't write one night because my hands hurt too much to type or I am too tired to think but my brain won't stop whirring.  There are days when I want to go out and sit in the sun but can't because I get too hot too fast and it just becomes uncomfortable.  There are afternoons, like today, when I have to curl in bed because the pain and the coldness won't go away and the only method of escape is sleep.  If it comes.

 But, I am not bed-ridden.  And for that I am eternally grateful.

I can do what I want, if I plan for it.  If I judge what else I have to do and think about how much energy that will take.  And sometimes, sometimes I say "Screw it" and bake a batch of cupcakes even though I know the next day I will pay for it.

Life is always about choices, about balancing the scales.  You don't get anything for free, and no one knows that better than a ME sufferer.  We bargain everyday just to do things other people take for granted.  Imagine having to choose between having a shower and doing the washing up.  Can you?  It really sounds stupid, but sometimes that is the reality.

At the moment, my reality is my degree.  I read to relax but I don't write, I don't go out and I don't have late nights because my energy is going to my degree and no matter what the result, it will mean more to me than anything.  It will mean more than all of my friends who finished their degrees years ago.

I might not ever be able to have a pressurized and high-flying job.  I might not ever be able to go back-packing round Australia.  But I guarantee, what I do achieve will be worth more than any of those things.

So don't feel bad for me because I struggle with this leech of an illness everyday.  Acknowledge that there are people in the world who fight different battles.  We might not look ill, we might seem like the life of the party but we do struggle.  And everything we do is made all the sweeter for it.

Or so I tell myself.

If you can spare five minutes, just think about people who suffer something different.  Who suffer from something science is only just beginning to acknowledge.  When I was first diagnosed, when I was 9, people thought it was a made up illness.  Even my class mates didn't accept it - despite the fact that I was asleep on the desk at 9.30 am.  There are still members of my family who don't get it, because they can't see it.  You can't see pain or fatigue or confusion.  

But it is there.  Day in, day out.  It colours everything and even though it mostly just fades into the background like white noise, there are still days when it raises its ugly head and bites.



If you are interested in helping promote ME you might also want to check out these sites because everyone is dealing with something different:
 
ME Research
Action for ME
The ME Association

Take care x

Have given into fashion and now am on Twitter!

My username is vixworth so feel free to come by and say hello!  I can't promise anything exciting but there will probably something... sometime....

Please... at the moment I have no followers... am so alone...

In other news... I have a fanfic bunny but was just interested to know - are people actually interested in COE fix-it fics???

Randomly cool fact....

Today we will all experience a once in a millennium event.

At 4 seconds before 12.35 pm - no matter where you are in the world it will be 12.34.56 on the 07/08/09 or 123456789!

How fun is that?!

Having just read this article I couldn't help but notice this statement regarding the character of Rose:

"she was enormously popular and so — let's be blunt — every time I brought her back, the ratings went up. It's my job to make people come back to watch this. Sometimes people roll their eyes and go, "Oh, you've got another returning character." [To which I respond] "Yeah, leave me alone with my millions, thank you very much." So you know, it simply works. Plus we like Billie... So simply by dint of being her, she's come back the most often. I think that was a very special chemistry between her and Chris and between her and David, and it's very fondly remembered."


Does anyone think that this all the more insulting given his comments that only "nine" people are protesting over Ianto?  If he bowed to fan pressure in the past and openly admits it how can he be making the statements he is now?  Quite obviously he does play favourites with his characters, which to a degree is understandable - they must be like 2d children.  However, surely the rules that govern one must govern another.  Or is it only Gwen and Rose that get the special treatment???

And, as for the justification that losing Ianto is Jack's penance for defeating the 456.  Surely losing his grandson and consequentially his daughter is enough of a penance?

Grr... am slightly annoyed!

ETA... woman_of_ is running a Popularity Contest for Who and Torchwood characters here... Go Vote!

My thoughts on CoE…

I have held off from saying anything really about season three because on the whole I was just overwhelmed by Ianto's death. But then I started thinking about things - from a viewer point of view and from that of an aspiring writer. Now, please remember this is my opinion and I have every right to it. I have thought long and hard about this and tried to analyse the story with as little bias as possible. However, I am a Janto Fan - despite all the shame that is apparently meant to engender - and do accept that this can cloud the issue. Still, I am entitled to my opinion and to bastardise the Evelyn Beatrice Hall quote, you might not agree with my opinion but you should defend to the death my right to say it. I am exercising that right regardless of your agreement or disagreement.

( My humble opinion may contain spoilers so read at your own discretion )

I welcome your opinions.

ETA... for further information on The Grotesque see this

Title: Not Just a Tea-boy
Pairing: Ianto/Jack (mentioned), Owen & Ianto (friends)
Rating: PG-13 for some swearing
Genre: General, Character Study
Warnings: A little swearing and mentions of a m/m relationship
Summary: Threats at Torchwood come in all shapes and sizes. One day its a marauding Weevil, the next its a colleague with a gun who’s a little pissed off. And sometime the battles you wage are simply ones for information.
Disclaimer: I own nothing, nada, neinte. It all belongs to Russell T Davis and the mighty BBC, our favourite Aunty.
Author’s Notes: This was written for a fic exchange at tw_ficexchange for dancing_hamster and my prompt was Owen and Ianto in the field. Well, I didn’t quite stick to that. There is an alien threat and there is conflict, but it’s of a different variety. I don’t think we see enough fics where Owen and Ianto are forced to get along because of something other than a life or death situation. So the field is the Hub and for all that they are a team, it doesn’t mean that they are friends.

Also, this is purely dialogue.... and the key to it is...

CAPS – denotes shouting
Italics - denotes emphasis


( Not Just a Tea-boy )

Soooo.... in a moment of sheer madness - it was madness I tell you! - I signed up for tardis_bigbang !   And it was good!

There are 45 new stories there and at least double that many pieces of art!  It is awesome!  So please go and check it out here! as so many people have put in a lot of hard work!  Especially the mods.  And if you do read remember the cardinal rule - FEEDBACK!!

Alternatively, this is my piece of fic!  Enjoy...

Title:  For Captain & Cardiff
Author: blackhemlock 
Genre: Torchwood, New Who : Gen
Rating: PG-13 (swearing, allusions to M/M relationship) 
Word Count:  43,000 words

Summary:  "At midnight, a nationwide security alert was sent out... Torchwood London, demands all agencies' cooperation in issuing an arrest warrant for Ianto Merric Jones, 24, of Cardiff."    Torchwood Three's Archivist has gone rogue. But, he does have a very good reason, and he looks stunning in his new suit.

Beta: ebonyflames

Notes: All Latitude and Longitude positions have been taken from this website so feel free to check them out.

Also: Huge thanks to azarsuerte (Azar) and megaloo13 (Meghan) for the wonderful artwork!  It made me all giddy last night - and I am still smiling at it!!!

 

It's Here!!  or... if for some horrible reason that link doesn't work the fic can also be found here

Title: Friends in Dead Places

Rating: PG13 (for a couple of bad words - Owen!)... However there is one NC17 chapter which will be clearly marked.
Characters/Pairings: Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Toshiko Sato, Owen Harper, Gwen Cooper, Jack/Ianto, Ianto/OMC, mentions Jack/OMC
Spoilers: Small ones for Cyberwoman, Countrycide, End of Days, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and Exit Wounds but nothing major!
Warnings: M/M relationships, violence, blood, Character Death, angst. Don't like any of those - don't read!
Length: apparently: 25,381 (oh dear.)

Summary: Ianto gets a lesson in dining, morality, mortality and the betrayal of friends.

Disclaimer: Torchwood belongs to RTD and the BBC, unfortunately. But if I owned them they'd have a lot more fun! This is a non-profit work of fiction and the only thing I lay claim to is the OMC and the plot (and I still have reservations on that one!)


( Figure it Out )

Title: Friends in Dead Places

Rating: PG13 (for a couple of bad words - Owen!)... However there is one NC17 chapter which will be clearly marked.
Characters/Pairings: Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Toshiko Sato, Owen Harper, Gwen Cooper, Jack/Ianto, Ianto/OMC, mentions Jack/OMC
Spoilers: Small ones for Cyberwoman, Countrycide, End of Days, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and Exit Wounds but nothing major!
Warnings: M/M relationships, violence, blood, Character Death, angst. Don't like any of those - don't read!
Length: apparently: 25,381 (oh dear.)

Summary: Ianto gets a lesson in dining, morality, mortality and the betrayal of friends.

Disclaimer: Torchwood belongs to RTD and the BBC, unfortunately. But if I owned them they'd have a lot more fun! This is a non-profit work of fiction and the only thing I lay claim to is the OMC and the plot (and I still have reservations on that one!)


( Never Ending Gifts )

Title: Friends in Dead Places

Rating: PG13 (for a couple of bad words - Owen!)... However there is one NC17 chapter which will be clearly marked.
Characters/Pairings: Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Toshiko Sato, Owen Harper, Gwen Cooper, Jack/Ianto, Ianto/OMC, mentions Jack/OMC
Spoilers: Small ones for Cyberwoman, Countrycide, End of Days, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and Exit Wounds but nothing major!
Warnings: M/M relationships, violence, blood, Character Death, angst. Don't like any of those - don't read!
Length: apparently: 25,381 (oh dear.)

Summary: Ianto gets a lesson in dining, morality, mortality and the betrayal of friends.

Disclaimer: Torchwood belongs to RTD and the BBC, unfortunately. But if I owned them they'd have a lot more fun! This is a non-profit work of fiction and the only thing I lay claim to is the OMC and the plot (and I still have reservations on that one!)


( Dearest Jack )

( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. )

Title: Friends in Dead Places

Rating: PG13 (for a couple of bad words - Owen!)... However there is one NC17 chapter which will be clearly marked.
Characters/Pairings: Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Toshiko Sato, Owen Harper, Gwen Cooper, Jack/Ianto, Ianto/OMC, mentions Jack/OMC
Spoilers: Small ones for Cyberwoman, Countrycide, End of Days, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and Exit Wounds but nothing major!
Warnings: M/M relationships, violence, blood, Character Death, angst. Don't like any of those - don't read!
Length: apparently: 25,381 (oh dear.)

Summary: Ianto gets a lesson in dining, morality, mortality and the betrayal of friends.

Disclaimer: Torchwood belongs to RTD and the BBC, unfortunately. But if I owned them they'd have a lot more fun! This is a non-profit work of fiction and the only thing I lay claim to is the OMC and the plot (and I still have reservations on that one!)

( Hot Knife Through Butter )

Title: Friends in Dead Places

Rating: PG13 (for a couple of bad words - Owen!)... However there is one NC17 chapter which will be clearly marked.
Characters/Pairings: Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Toshiko Sato, Owen Harper, Gwen Cooper, Jack/Ianto, Ianto/OMC, mentions Jack/OMC
Spoilers: Small ones for Cyberwoman, Countrycide, End of Days, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and Exit Wounds but nothing major!
Warnings: M/M relationships, violence, blood, Character Death, angst. Don't like any of those - don't read!
Length: apparently: 25,381 (oh dear.)

Summary: Ianto gets a lesson in dining, morality, mortality and the betrayal of friends.

Disclaimer: Torchwood belongs to RTD and the BBC, unfortunately. But if I owned them they'd have a lot more fun! This is a non-profit work of fiction and the only thing I lay claim to is the OMC and the plot (and I still have reservations on that one!)


( Morality of Mortality )